Groundhogs Day = Complete Sham!

I know a few of you have already had the opportunity to hear this rant, but I think it's important that everyone knows the truth about Groundhogs Day. I hold anyone who was previously privy to this information personally responsible for keeping me ignorant until an embarrassing 23 years of age.

There is no such thing as a groundhog. "Groundhog" is actually another name for a woodchuck! That's right, we celebrate a woodchuck popping out of its hole. Equally disturbing is that the famous "groundhog" we trust to predict the coming of spring, Punxsutawney Phil, actually lives in the Punxsutawney library. There, he eats ice cream and dog food until February 2nd when he is relocated to a heated burrow under a simulated tree stump. How an animal that lives in a controlled environment could continue to predict the coming of spring is awfully confusing. Perhaps that is why his accuracy rating is only 39% Some research revealed to me that Phil has met with many celebrities including Oprah Winfrey and Ronald Reagan. Now that's just ridiculous. It's a woodchuck. However, a funny sidenote, Canada has their own albino groundhog named Wiarton Willie. Those crazy Canadians always know how to one-up us.